Narcissists are often talked about, but many people don’t fully understand them. These individuals have a way of making relationships complicated and confusing. While most of us know the basic signs of narcissism, there’s a lot more to learn about how narcissists think and act. I’ve compiled a list of 15 things to help you better understand narcissistic behavior.
They can be insecure
Narcissists often seem very confident, but this isn’t always true. Deep down, many narcissists feel insecure and unsure of themselves. They put on a show of being super confident to hide these feelings. This insecurity is why they often need lots of praise and attention from others.
They struggle with empathy
Narcissists find it hard to understand or care about other people’s feelings. They might seem caring sometimes, but it’s usually just an act. This lack of empathy makes it difficult for them to have real, close relationships. It’s also why they often hurt people without feeling bad about it.
They can be charming at first
Many narcissists are very charming when you first meet them. They know how to make a good first impression and can seem very likable. This charm helps them attract friends, partners, or followers. However, this nice behavior usually doesn’t last long once they’ve got what they want.
They often have a victim mentality
Narcissists often see themselves as victims, even when they’re the ones causing problems. They blame others for their mistakes and never take responsibility. This victim mentality helps them avoid feeling bad about their actions. It also makes them seek sympathy from others instead of changing their behavior.
They can be jealous of others’ success
Despite seeming very confident, narcissists often feel jealous when others do well. They hate seeing someone else get attention or praise. This jealousy can make them try to bring others down or steal the spotlight. It’s hard for them to be happy with other people’s achievements.
They struggle with criticism
Narcissists have a hard time handling criticism, even if it’s meant to be helpful. They see any criticism as a personal attack. This makes it difficult for them to improve or learn from their mistakes. They might get angry, defensive, or try to turn things around on the person who criticized them.
They often use manipulation tactics
Narcissists are usually very skilled at manipulating others. They use tactics like guilt-tripping, lying, or twisting facts to get what they want, which can be hard to spot at first. This manipulation allows them to control situations and the people around them.
They have a hard time apologizing
Saying sorry is very difficult for narcissists. They don’t like admitting they’ve done anything wrong. Even if they do apologize, it’s often not sincere. They might make excuses or try to blame others instead of taking responsibility for their actions.
They can be very competitive
Narcissists often turn everything into a competition. They always want to be the best and can’t stand losing. This competitiveness can show up in small ways, like always trying to one-up others in conversations. It can make relationships with them feel exhausting and one-sided.
They often have a fear of abandonment
Many narcissists are actually afraid of being left or abandoned. This fear can make them act clingy or controlling in relationships. They might try to keep people close by making them feel guilty or dependent. This fear of abandonment often comes from deep-seated insecurity.
They can be generous but with strings attached
Sometimes, narcissists can seem very generous. They might give gifts or do favors for others. However, this generosity usually comes with expectations. They use their generosity to control others or make them feel indebted. It’s not true kindness but a tool for manipulation.
They often have a poor sense of personal boundaries
Narcissists typically don’t respect other people’s boundaries. They might share too much personal information or expect others to always be available to them. This lack of boundaries can make relationships with narcissists feel overwhelming. They often don’t understand or care when they’re making others uncomfortable.
They can be very sensitive to perceived slights
While narcissists dish out criticism easily, they’re often very sensitive to any perceived insult. Even small things that aren’t meant as criticism can upset them deeply. This sensitivity comes from their fragile self-esteem. It can make them react angrily to innocent comments or actions.
They often have a grandiose sense of self-importance
Narcissists tend to see themselves as more important or special than they really are. They might exaggerate their achievements or talents. This inflated self-image helps them feel better about themselves. However, it can also lead them to expect special treatment or think rules don’t apply to them.
They can experience periods of depression
Despite their outward confidence, narcissists can experience deep depression. This often happens when their inflated self-image is challenged. They might become very depressed when they don’t get the admiration they crave. These depressive periods can be intense but are usually short-lived.
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