Zombie apocalypses have captured our imagination for decades, inspiring countless movies, books, and TV shows. As a horror genre enthusiast, I’ve often pondered how people would react if the undead began roaming the streets.
While survival guides offer practical advice, many individuals might make some truly outlandish choices in the heat of the moment. In this blog, I’ll explore some of the wildest and most ill-advised first moves people might attempt when faced with a zombie outbreak.
Zombie Selfie Attempt
Some people might try to snap a selfie with a zombie for social media fame. This incredibly dangerous move could result in getting bitten or worse. It shows a complete misunderstanding of the threat zombies pose. Prioritizing social media over survival is a recipe for disaster.
Costume Party Camouflage
A misguided individual might think dressing up as a zombie is a clever disguise. They could raid a costume shop for zombie makeup and tattered clothes. This plan ignores that zombies likely don’t rely on visual cues alone to find prey. Getting too close to real zombies to test this theory would be extremely risky.
Zombie Pet Adoption
Someone might attempt to keep a zombie as a pet, thinking they can train it. They could try to capture a zombie and keep it in their garage or basement. This ignores the highly infectious nature of zombie bites and the uncontrollable aggression of the undead. It’s a surefire way to endanger yourself and others.
Blasting Thriller on Loudspeakers
Inspired by Michael Jackson’s famous video, a person might play “Thriller” loudly to make zombies dance. They could set up speakers in the street, hoping to distract or control the undead. This plan completely misunderstands the nature of real zombies versus pop culture depictions. It would likely attract more zombies and put everyone in danger.
Zombie-Proof Bubble Suit
Someone might try to create a bite-proof suit using inflatable pool toys or bubble wrap. They could spend crucial time taping together makeshift armor instead of seeking real shelter. This DIY approach ignores the strength of zombies and the need for mobility in a crisis. It would likely result in a quick, if somewhat cushioned, demise.
Zombie Negotiation Attempt
An optimistic person might try to reason or negotiate with the zombies. They could approach a zombie with their hands raised, attempting to communicate peacefully. This ignores the fundamental nature of zombies as mindless, aggressive creatures. It would likely end in infection or death for the would-be diplomat.
Extreme Grocery Shopping
Some might rush to buy enormous amounts of their favorite snacks or non-essential items. They could fill shopping carts with chips, soda, and candy instead of practical supplies. This wastes valuable time and ignores the need for nutritious, long-lasting food in a crisis. It shows a failure to prioritize real survival needs over comfort foods.
Zombie Research Lab Setup
A curious scientist-type might try to capture zombies for study instead of fleeing. They could attempt to set up a makeshift lab in their home to examine zombie behavior. This incredibly dangerous plan overestimates their ability to safely contain zombies. It prioritizes satisfying curiosity over personal and community safety.
Social Media Livestreaming
Some might decide to livestream the zombie apocalypse on social media platforms. They could waste time setting up equipment and narrating events instead of taking action. This plan ignores the likelihood of rapid infrastructure breakdown in a crisis. It also dangerously divides attention in life-threatening situations.
Zombie Prank Calls
A prankster might use the chaos to make zombie-themed prank calls to friends or authorities. They could tie up important phone lines with fake reports or jokes. This immature response could hinder real emergency communications and spread misinformation. It shows a failure to grasp the severity of the situation.
Amusement Park Fortress
Someone might decide an amusement park would make a perfect zombie-proof fortress. They could head to the nearest theme park, planning to use rides as lookout towers. This ignores the difficulty of securing such a large, open area with multiple entry points. It also overlooks the lack of essential resources in an entertainment venue.
Also read: 13 Most Common Phobias and What They Reveal About Us
Zombie Apocalypse Party
Some might throw an “end of the world” party instead of preparing for survival. They could invite friends over, wasting crucial time and resources on celebration. This plan dangerously ignores the immediate need for action and preparation. It could result in a group of unprepared, possibly intoxicated people facing a zombie horde.
Tropical Island Escape Attempt
A person might try to steal a boat and escape to a remote tropical island. They could waste time packing beach gear and planning an island paradise escape. This plan ignores their likely lack of long-term survival skills and naval navigation experience. It also assumes zombies can’t spread to islands, which might not be true.
Zombie Victory Garden
Some might decide to immediately start a vegetable garden for long-term food supply. They could spend the crucial first hours planting seeds instead of securing their immediate safety. While long-term food planning is important, this ignores more pressing short-term survival needs. It also assumes they’ll be able to stay in one place long enough for plants to grow.
Zombie-Proof Car Modification
A car enthusiast might try to quickly modify their vehicle into a zombie-proof battle car. They could waste valuable time attaching makeshift armor or weapons to their car. This plan overestimates their engineering skills and the car’s usefulness in potentially gridlocked streets.
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