Why Dunbar’s Number Suggests You Can Only Have 150 Real Friends

Humans are social creatures, but the number of meaningful connections we can maintain might be smaller than you think. British anthropologist Robin Dunbar suggests that the brain’s capacity for relationships is limited to about 150 close friendships.

This number, now known as Dunbar’s Number, explains why many friendships remain surface-level even in the age of social media. It’s not about how many people you can meet but how many you can genuinely know. The science behind it provides a fascinating insight into how we form and manage social circles.

The Origin of Dunbar’s Number

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Robin Dunbar, a British anthropologist, first proposed the idea in the 1990s. He found that human brains are wired to maintain about 150 meaningful relationships. This concept is based on studies of primate social groups and how their brain size relates to the complexity of their social lives. Dunbar then applied these findings to human beings.

Why 150?

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Dunbar’s research suggested a correlation between brain size and social group size. He concluded that a human brain can only handle around 150 stable social relationships. The limit isn’t just due to time constraints but also the cognitive effort required to maintain personal connections. These relationships extend beyond mere acquaintances.

Layers of Friendship

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Dunbar’s theory also breaks friendships into layers, with the closest circle having about five people. Beyond that, the circles expand to 15, 50, and finally 150. Each layer represents a decline in emotional closeness, from intimate friends to more casual acquaintances. The number drops as emotional investment decreases.

The Role of Cognitive Limits

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Cognitive limitations play a big role in maintaining relationships. To keep meaningful friendships, our brains must keep track of shared experiences, emotions, and social cues. As social circles grow, these tasks become more challenging, leading to weaker connections with those on the periphery.

Modern Social Networks

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Dunbar’s Number might seem outdated in the age of social media, but the principle still holds. Even if you have thousands of followers or friends online, you’ll likely maintain real connections with only a small fraction of them. Online interaction may increase the number of acquaintances, but not genuine friendships.

Social Media vs. Real Life

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While social media can help keep distant connections alive, it doesn’t usually translate into strong bonds. The cognitive load of managing many online friendships is the same as in real life. Most people still limit their meaningful interactions to around 150 people, even when technology makes broader communication possible.

Workplace Applications

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Dunbar’s Number can also be applied to organizational structures. Companies with fewer than 150 employees often foster a stronger sense of community. Once groups grow beyond that size, they tend to split into smaller subgroups, as people struggle to maintain close working relationships with everyone.

Community Building

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In small communities, 150 people are often enough to build a cohesive and supportive environment. Historically, tribes and villages were typically made up of groups around this size, enabling everyone to maintain a close-knit society. Larger communities tend to break into smaller factions or subgroups over time.

Friendship Maintenance

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Maintaining 150 close friendships requires effort, as these bonds don’t sustain themselves. This involves regular communication, shared experiences, and emotional investment. Once someone moves out of that active circle, the friendship can weaken if not nurtured properly.

Emotional Bandwidth

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Dunbar’s Number reflects the limited emotional bandwidth humans have. It’s not possible to care deeply for an unlimited number of people. With a set amount of emotional energy, most individuals focus on maintaining close ties with fewer people, leaving others on the outer edges of their social network.

Quality over Quantity

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Ultimately, Dunbar’s Number highlights the importance of quality over quantity in friendships. It suggests that it’s better to focus on a smaller group of meaningful relationships rather than spreading yourself too thin. Maintaining a manageable number of close friends allows for deeper connections and more fulfilling social lives.

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Mary Apurong

Mary Apurong is an experienced writer and editor who enjoys researching topics related to lifestyle and creating content on gardening, food, travel, crafts, and DIY. She spends her free time doing digital art and watching documentaries. Check out some of her works on Mastermind Quotes.